Conventional Wisdom and Reality on Stakeholder Buy-in.

From the beginning of the planning phases of a program, stakeholder buy-in is essential. Program success is unlikely unless the community is drawn in from the start. Once stakeholders are on board with a program’s ideas, they are likely to remain involved, supporting the program over its lifetime. 

From Innovation Network
 
The preceding quote is pretty much the conventional thought on stakeholder buy-in. But when is conventional thought, incorrect thought, or not applicable to the reality on the ground?
 
Maybe when the stakeholder's competing interests are irreconcilable and complete buy-in is not possible.  

• When does an executive decide that "enough is enough" and stakeholder interests are not reconcilable.
• What happens then?
• Who gets their feelings hurt?
• How do you repair damaged relationships?
• Who makes the decisions and how do you move forward to a successful project completion.

I don't have any answers (and maybe no one has), but I find myself asking these questions because I am in the middle of a project with just such a conundrum.

In this case the decision to move forward without full stakeholder consensus was made by the CEO due to budget and external force reasons. (We will be experiencing lots of that over the next few years).

The outcome is unclear at this stage, but I am sure, without any doubt, that the project will be a winner for the greater organization. However there are already hurt feelings and damaged relationships. I am NOT the project manager, just a consultant, but I am sure I will have to suffer also. The good thing is that I have a long successful track record with this organization and I also have a secure fall-back position.

What am I doing? Running for cover? maybe or maybe not?  At the second highest level I checked to see how I was fairing and I am fine. It appears the actions of others on the team caused the reaction. When I run into the CEO, I will figure out what to say on the fly. With others on the project, I will act pleasant and professionally and not worry about what they may say, think, or feel about me.

I am at an age when I know that I am doing my best (or worst) and do not care one whit about "career" issues. Hopefully, everyone gets to that place in their professional life eventually.

So what's the point of this posting:

• Conventional wisdom often fails on the ground.
• Occasionally all your good work goes down the drain.
• Don't worry too much if you are doing your level best
• Act professionally and never hold a grudge when things don't go your way.
• Don't worry about what is said about you, your boss's opinion is all that counts.
• Live in the future and don't over dwell on the past.

So the final take away, Projects can be successful for the organization, but not always for the team; and In the words of the Rolling Stones:

You can't always get what you want, And if you try sometime you find, You get what you need.